Based in melbourne, Australia, between all & nothing is a blog by sneha lees, a recovering perfectionist.

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The Dreamer vs. the Perfectionist

The Dreamer vs. the Perfectionist

We all have a dreamer in us. That dreamer probably lives next door to our inner perfectionist.

They both walk out to collect the paper every morning.

One day, the conversation goes as follows:

Dreamer: Morning!
Perfectionist: Good morning. How are you?
Dreamer: Fantastic! I just had this brilliant idea!
Perfectionist: Oh yeah? I'll bet it's going to be awesome! Let's hear it!

A few weeks down the track...

Perfectionist: This is not working out the way we imagined.
Dreamer: That's okay. Let's just do the best we can. We may even surprise ourselves.
Perfectionist: Nope. I'm out.

A year later...

Dreamer: Hey, how's it going? I know it's been a while since we talked. Our last project didn't go too well. But I had this new idea that I thought you might be interested in.
Perfectionist: Hey, thanks but no thanks. We'll probably mess it up. I have somewhere else to be anyway. See you later.

The dreamer can respond in one of two ways.

  1. You're right. There goes that idea.
    or

  2. I hope you'll reconsider when I get to the reviewing stage of this project because I sure could do with your input then. But I'm doing this with or without you.

I hope your inner dreamer will choose number two. And when he or she does, chances are that our lovely neighbour, the perfectionist, will be back again, keen as ever to help. At which point, our dreamer has two options again.

  1. Sure, go ahead.
    or

  2. You can make some changes, but you're not allowed to take over. This can be better but it will never be perfect. Got that?

Only when the perfectionist agrees should  you go ahead. Make your inner dreamer and your inner perfectionist sign an agreement.

If you can get that perfectionist to agree to boundaries; to not take over and to not give up, you'll be off to an excellent start and hopefully, an excellent finish as well.

The perfectionist needs to report to the dreamer, not the other way around.  The dreamer needs to be the boss.

After all, we talk about dreams coming true. We don't talk about perfections coming true; it doesn't make sense and there's no such thing.

 

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